Nicole and I just returned from an entire week of being pampered and released from regular demands as a pastor and pastors wife. We were connected with a ministry called SHOR (Shepherds Haven Of Rest). This ministry is designed specifically to minister to Ministers. That may not seem significant to you at this moment but for those called to lead Churches; it is a God sent. For one entire week Nicole and I were not allowed to do anything but reconnect with each other. You see seven years ago we accepted a position as pastor of a small church in Southwest Louisiana. It was at this moment we put our lives on hold to help a hurting church that we knew God had called us to. That was seven years ago. At times I was working, pastoring and continuing my education. Even in light of accepting a full time position the demands were and are enormous. For seven years Nicole and I have never intentionally invested in our marriage; all the while drifting a part. It was not fast or even noticeable by the passerby, but it was happening. You may not be comfortable with that but pasrors and their wives are human too. Through a series of events I became acquainted with SHOR Ministry and their mission of restoring pastors. Even then, I was certain this was for someone else not us. After probably one of the toughest years of ministry so far, I began to seriously consider the need to get away. Exhausted, frustrated and just down right burned out; I felt like i was gasping for air. The ministry of SHOR resurfaced again. It was as if God Himself was saying, "Hey dummy, you need this!" With a reluctant spirit I went through the process to apply for one of their retreats. Long story short, in no time we were accepted. Still not sure if getting away was the thing we needed to do or honestly if I want to, God slapped me across the head yet again. Since the first of the year, I have been busier than ever. In one door and out the other. One night as I was preparing to leave out again, Nicole said something that I could not miss. And I quote, "I will be glad when we get out of town so you can love on me!" Now you may take that wrong and if you do, oh well, because it only means you do not know my wife and her heart for where we serve. If you do know her you then understand why I was unable to miss that. My wife loves our church and this community as much as I do, but God knew we need to get away and He also knew I would not leave. That statement cut me deep. You see I realize I was sacrificing my marriage for the ministry and God had not called me to do that. I was working harder than ever, yet becoming increasingly unhealthy. I was exhausted physically, emotionally and spiritual. I was literally running on fumes. So was my wife and through one simple comment she let me know that she had reached her limit of sharing me with the community. Now she would probably say different, but again that would be her heart for where we serve. So it was final we are going to get away even if everything falls apart. SHOR Ministry does not accept children so it was just Nicole and I off to a mountain resort. Surprisingly we adapted quickly. This is important because we never do anything with out our kids. Never and we like that way. We have never complained about having them with us or look for ways to get rid of them. Had SHOR accepted children they would have been in-tow. But God knew what we needed. For a solid week we were not allowed to even fix our own drinks. This was so counter to all we knew. We were fussed at many times for trying to help or hide the fact that we just poured our own coffee. It is the mission of this ministry to return the servce to those who are always serving other. I did not realize how much a part of my life it was to serve until I was stripped of the ability to do so. We had the freedom to come and go as we wanted. Nicole and I laughed more together in that week than we had in seven years. Even if it meant Nicole falling in a creek! We held hands and shared our hearts with each other. We really began to heal and it showed, in just a weeks time. It wasnt until the last full day that we had with SHOR Ministry that the Lord spoke to my heart. Even He stepped back and allowed us to rest, even though we spent time daily with Him. It wasn't a silence, but rather a calm peace. It was like laying in your Father's lap, just complete contentment. One the last day we managed to get in one last four mile hike. As we were returning for supper that night, the Father spoke four simple words into my heart, "Healthy Shepherd Healthy Sheep." It was God's way of saying to this type A guy/ pastor, "It is ok if you rest." "In fact you should." "I have." You have to understand for me that was huge. I have always worked hard to please my employers and what greater employer than God Himself. Who better than to work as hard as possible than God? Now the Boss was saying it is ok for me to rest. Not just ok but necessary. I was overwhelmed with relief, because part of me felt guilty for shoving off for a week. For this pastor it was that moment I needed, because one of the greatest concerns of my life is the health of His Church. Some people have monumental moments that change their life or ministry. For me it was four simple words, "Healthy Shepherd Healthy Sheep." See, when we are healthy we can fight harder, stand longer, see clearer and lead better. All the things good sheep need.
Starting May 20th part of our ministry goal is to be healthy shepherds that can produce healthy sheep.
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